i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Say something about gay babies.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
