He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
