Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
one two three fourrrrnication!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
