I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize