Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
