My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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