I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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