I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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