Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
how does that bad decision feel?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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