K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
