woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
