piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
