whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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