none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
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