is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
