And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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