I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize