the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
