just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize