They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
