you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
