i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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