There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize
