He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
