we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
