Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
