You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
