your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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