You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
she woke up with a sticky ear
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Redeem this text for a blowjob
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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