I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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