Where is the hickey?
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
