went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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