Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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