Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
BRING THE BAGELS
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
