p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
