Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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