she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
