I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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