he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
