.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
