why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize