the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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