R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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