You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
