Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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