what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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