i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
