we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Randomize
