So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
