Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
